I just love me some Babylon Bee!
Sep 24, 2024 · BabylonBee.com
When Donald Trump recently promised that, if elected, he would abolish the Department of Education, Democrats pounced on the statement, foretelling an apocalyptic hellscape of the uneducated should the federal government no longer oversee education in the United States.
Through extensive investigation, The Babylon Bee has compiled the following list of far-reaching and terrifying consequences of abolishing the Department of Education:
1. Fewer tax dollars taken by the federal government: You may now be forced to take your kids to Disneyland this year.
2. Children will only learn about two of the seventy-two genders: Unless they live in California, then they can still learn about all seventy-two genders AND how to smoke pot out of a banana peel all before second grade.
3. Child might be left behind: This has not happened once since it was declared America declared NO CHILD LEFT BEHIND.
4. Kids will learn how to do math the actual way instead of with those weird number lines: Imagine the world returning to actual mathematics instead of the mysterious, arcane processes of Common Core.
5. No one to write "this page intentionally left blank" on intentionally left blank pages on standardized tests: States won't be able to handle this level of complicated bureaucratic finagling.
6. 4,400 unelected government bureaucrats will have to find new jobs as CNN correspondents: Nothing is more terrifying than adding more CNN correspondents.
7. Kids will never learn how to do anything: Just like how it was before 1979 when the Department of Education was founded.
8. Decentralizing government power is always a bad idea: In such a dangerous scenario, freedom may ensue.
9. No one will D.A.R.E. to keep kids off drugs: Illicit drugs will run rampant through American schools which is totally different from the way things are now.
10. 2+2 will equal 4 again: Back to the horrific, oppressive days of the 1950s we go!
In this powerful episode of The Sam Sorbo Show, I sit down with Sandra Garcia, a former public school teacher and assistant principal who walked away from the system after witnessing firsthand the alarming changes that took hold during the Covid era. Sandra saw the truth behind the new, ludicrous regulations and questioned why vital information was being kept from parents. As she watched the ripple effect on individual children, she knew she could no longer stay silent. Taking a bold step, she left government schooling behind and embraced homeschooling her own children. Now, Sandra is speaking out about what she experienced, why she chose a different path, and how families can reclaim their children’s education.
Unlock exclusive discounts, discover where to purchase my books, explore my homeschool and curriculum recommendations, and so much more—all in one place! Click the link to take advantage of these incredible resources. Don’t miss out—start exploring today: ...
On this episode of The Sam Sorbo Show, I sit down with the fearless and unapologetic Based Mother herself, Elena Barbera. We’re exposing how the DOJ is funneling $100 million into woke propaganda in classrooms—undermining parental rights and reshaping education behind our backs. Elena, a bold Christian conservative and homeschooling advocate, breaks down what’s really happening, why it matters, and how you can fight back. Don’t miss this powerful conversation—because the future of our children is on the line. Learn more about Elena Barbera at https://thebasedmother.com/home
Just had an incredibly powerful conversation about school choice on Refining Rhetoric. We broke down how school choice is the Trojan horse—promising freedom but ultimately opening the door for government control over private and homeschool education. Don't miss this critical discussion—check it out here: https://sites.libsyn.com/401489/words-for-warriors
